Some people choose to start a self discovery journey, my case is different…self discovery literally showed up uninvited, unannounced… very unethical indeed 😒😒 The flames 🔥 came to me (they’re still coming🙄) and i had no other choices than to go through them and it was in that process that my journey started.
The first year of my academic years was one of the hardest challenges I’ve had to overcome in my life. I told you guys earlier about the language struggle but there’s more to it. 👇🏾
*Disclaimer: this post is a bit long but the ending is beautiful(I think😁) so keep scrolling down😊
So the first day of university started, I was all excited and happy…”Yaaayy! This is it…I’m starting university…I know I’ll be great….I got this…I’ll make my parents proud🎉🎉🎉 etc…” I was literally having a party in my head. I went inside the lecture hall, sat on the first row and I had everything well organized…my note pad was freshhh and I had up to 5 pens guys I was serious. So the lecturer came in, greeted everybody and started lecturing….
Guys, what I’m about to tell you is true….all I heard from the lecturer that day went like : “gfsuhbegscg jshshgsgsv unstaffed koojsgahhs ihshga really jshstffs..uushsffvajn,,,/()&/$$/)?/6/$&-@&…”😳😳😳….my eyes couldn’t believe what my ears were hearing, my brain refused to process what my ears were hearing and my heart…my poor little heart was so broken….🙆🏾♀️I started having headache…I immediately fell ill 🤒..fever guys….I had an instant fever 🤒….
At the end of the lecture I kept asking myself , what am I really doing here???😫 I wanted to call my parents to tell them that I quit!…I don’t wanna do this, I don’t think I can do this…I went back to my flat and cried😭😭😭guys…I cried, I could fill up a whole bucket and bath with it…but somehow, I kept attending the lecturers even though I didn’t get much from them.
Few days later, it was time to write my first assignment. So, I prepared myself, I tried to read and reread the course pack…I didn’t understand much tho 😂… but I told myself it’s an assignment and i understand the question, so how hard can it be🤷🏾♀️…I can do this, I got this💪🏾 So, I spent days writing and rewriting and correcting my work and all. The submission day finally arrived and I submitted on time! I was like, what’s the worst that can happen anyway?🤷🏾♀️ After all I’m sure i understood the question and gave the right answer according to the course pack…so I’m good!👍🏾
The papers came back few days later and I went to fetch mine…guess what was my mark?👉🏾…30%…30…thir👏🏾ty👏🏾per👏🏾cent👏🏾y’all…And the lecturer side note said that he gave me 30 cause he couldn’t go lower than that…guys who does that?😫😫😫…I’m someone’s kid stop doing this to me…😭😭😭…I almost had a cardiac arrest💔!….I ran out of breath…I told myself that’s it! I quit…started giving myself the same quitting speech again…I was so disappointed….But somehow, I found myself in school again, attending lectures and I actually never gave my parents that call to tell them I give up 🤷🏾♀️because I never even found the strength to call them.
I believe it was at that moment of my life that I discovered that I am no quitter because it didn’t matter how broken I felt, I would still somehow find myself in class, in the library, in tutorials, researching online. I spent nights sleeping in the library because I studied so much I didn’t keep track of time. So I slept in the library coz it was too late to go home….I had to move out of my comfort zone…I had to go the extra mile….And the next thing I know I’m graduating👩🏾🎓and completing my honors and graduating👩🏾🎓completing my masters and all…I look back 👀and I’m like I actually never gave up, did I? I realized that I am actually stronger than I thought I was💭
All I’m trying to say is just because it didn’t work out the first time doesn’t mean it never gonna work out. Celebrate your victories, no matter how small they are, and when you are defeated dust yourself , stand up and try again. If you feel that it is really worth it, then be willing to put in the work and do it the right way. I’m sure you all know the saying that goes: “quitters never win and winners never quit” I know it’s so cliché but guys this statement is based on facts! If you have to quit, then quit quitting the good things and quit the bad ones( did you get that??😄😁😁 did it on purpose🙈😁).
This is the last part of my self discovery journey write up😊…One of the most important things I have discovered about myself is that I do not know how to quit, so there is a high probability that I might not be a quitter😊the journey still goes on tho, but the writing part of it ends here😊
What have you discovered about yourself so far? We wanna know more about it, let us know with a comment, you might help someone😊 who knows🤷🏾♀️?
I leave you with this👇🏾 thought:
“The greatest discovery in life is self-discovery. Until you find yourself, you’ll always be someone else. Become yourself.”
Until we meet again…A plus!!!